A Neighbor Just Like You

So let’s make the most of this beautiful day…
Would you be mine? Could you be mine?

Ever since downtown has been downright invaded by people giving out free newspapers on the street (24 Hours, Metro and one other one whose name eludes me because it’s crappy with no crossword — possibly Rush Hour? Anyways…) I’ve been taking them every once in a while because I like doing the crosswords and sudoku puzzles. Normally when I flip through them I’m not overly interested in the content for the most part but sometimes there are some headlines that catch my eye. This post would be a lot more specific if I’d kept one of them, but the article made me kind of mad and I threw it away… it didn’t occur to me to write about it until today…

I don’t think this is a new claim, but an article in one of the papers said that some psychologists had decided that Mr. Rogers is to blame for my generation’s view that we’re entitled to everything in life. Why? Because he mentioned in his episodes that every child is special. “Remember kids, you’re special.”

Okay, that just makes me mad and it’s an outrageous thing to say! For several reasons in my opinion. And my opinion is all I have, because I’m not a fancy psychologist but I am part of the generation and definitely watched Mr. Rogers for the first five to six years of my life. So, here are the reasons why it made me mad…

First, to say that my whole generation is selfish is pretty obvious. But wait a minute, isn’t humanity as a whole selfish? Don’t many of us, regardless of age, look out for number one? The article used the example of an increase of students coming to their professors and demanding higher marks. Yeah, Mr. Rogers is written all over that, isn’t it? Come on! Maybe students want higher marks than they got for other reasons… yes that could be a possibility! Perhaps because they couldn’t learn anything due to their professor’s unintelligible accent or inept teaching skills. Not all people who hold doctorates can teach, let’s be honest. However, okay, I will concede that this is an exceptionally self-seeking generation, but I still think it has little to do with a guy on TV mentioning to us that we’re actually worth something.

Second, there’s no way watching Mr. Rogers did more damage than good. Mr. Rogers was a polite guy who taught us to be hospitable and that it pays off to show people some respect. To be honest, until I read the article I’d completely forgotten that he ended episodes with “you’re special”. It didn’t register with me at that age enough to make an impression because I was used to hearing things like that. My parents were loving and supportive, they built me up but kept me in check, setting high standards but assuring they could be met with a little work. I always knew I was worth something, at least to certain people. But what about the kids without such a support system? What about the ones with broken, dysfunctional families or too-busy parents, unsure that anyone felt anything for them? I have no way of knowing, but I think a familiar face on TV saying “you’re special, you’re worth something” would be reassuring. Not enough to turn their mind to pure greed and selfishness, but enough to give them hope. That’s why I think it’s horrible to make Mr. Rogers into a villain, especially now (or as of Feb ’03) when he can’t defend himself.

Third, the first five years of a kid’s life are, of course, very important. But also impressing are the everyday cultural things that people deal with when they start to make their own decisions and manage their own money. This age is the very worst for targeted advertising and sheer materialism. Everywhere we turn, we’re being told, “you deserve this, you’re worth it, treat yourself” because if people respond to thoughts like that, others make money, which was the original goal. I’m fairly confident that growing up and living in this North American culture of perpetual want is damaging our sense of what we’re really entitled to more then poor Mr. Rogers ever did.

And anyways, it’s not like he was lying. Every kid is special, so maybe they should be allowed to hear it every once in a while. He never said, “you’re worth the world to every human on this planet so make sure you step on people’s heads as you claw your way to the top”.

Well, I feel better!