I’m Useless, But Not For Long
The future is coming on, it’s coming on, it’s coming on.
Maybe true freedom is to live a life without delusions. All they do is hold us back.
I’ve always thought my teachers taught me the most important lessons when they weren’t standing by a blackboard. My drama teacher from Jr. High, Ro Montgomery… amazing woman. I have virtually no dramatic talent and no one could ever hope to fix that, but I think I got a tidbit of true, eternal wisdom from her in something she mentioned to me casually one day. She said, ‘You know, the worst four-letter F-word isn’t the word you think it is. It’s ‘Fear’. Just think about all the things we miss out on because of it. Think of all the years we waste. I’d drink to that, you know, if I had to drink to one thing forever: That fear would stop us never.’
Stupid fear and inhibition and self-consciousness. So much of what I’m hung up on doesn’t even matter. That’s why I think if I could shed all the delusions, I’d be satisfied. Because you can get used to the truth even if you don’t like it.
My cat is afraid of balloons and big boxes even though there’s basically no way they could ever hurt her. If I have a balloon in my room, she won’t go in. She’ll avoid walking past it. If you pick her up and bring her in there, she’ll shred you up and howl. I can’t help but think I’m the same way about things, just on a different scale. Afraid of things that could not possibly hurt me.
But we hang on to delusions and hopes, don’t we. I want that fear would stop me never. I want that fear would stop me never. I want that fear would stop me never.
I always thought one of the best pieces of advice in the song “Everybody’s Free” is “Do one thing every day that scares you”, because you would almost invariably run out of fears before you run out of days.
Yeah, unless doing the thing that scared you didn’t completely cure you of the fear– Or, unless it killed you. I’m afraid of running into oncoming traffic for example..!
Heh, I would assume said advice would encourage a certain amount of reason. Like, say, no playing chicken on the railroad tracks.
I enjoyed this entry.
-DaveC
Beautiful entry, Coco. At the end of the day I think a lot of it comes down to choice: give into the fear, or trust God that He won’t let you completely fall (and if you do fall that He will pick you back up). And at the end of the day, I think that risk makes life exciting and allows humans to live lives full of passion.
The short version of my answer is….the most exciting times of my life have been when, despite the fear, I jumped in…and that’s when God took me to exciting places (outside of me and challenged the insides of me) in ways I couldn’t see with my own eyes…but I’m soooo glad He did! Many examples available upon request.
From,
The Formerly Shy Kid Who Sat At The Back of The Class and Whose Face Turned Red When She Was Called On and Was Terrified To Step Out of the Box
The worst F-word that people think of is probably the most robust word in the English language. It can be used almost anywhere!!!!
Like the peeps before, great entry. You’re a dreamer and a thinker.
The only coherent thought that I have about fear revolves how much of a role it’s played in my life. So many things I do in life is/was and will be motivated by the fear of failing.